I'm Knitting on a Plane

I am on a plane. I fly frequently and have very specific rituals, each intelligently gleaned from past unintelligent experiences.

I was delighted to discover that knitting on planes was allowed back when I was a new knitter. There was a bit of a balancing act that needed to take place though. I didn’t know where to put the ball of yarn so I had it in my lap; it then fell out of my lap and rolled to the back of the plane under about 10 rows of seats. I had to go to the back of the plane and coax each person into handing the ball of yarn under the seat in front of them until I got back to my seat. This is why I sit at the back of the plane. And why I have a Ziploc bag for the yarn ball.

I was on a flight to Beijing and was sitting in a window seat next to a Chinese gentleman. He promptly fell asleep and I immediately regretted the large tea I had just before the flight. I sat still as long as I could, silently debating if I should wake him up or try to jump over him. Somehow jump over him seemed more rational, despite my short stature. I ended up both kicking him and falling into his lap, and couldn’t explain how I ended up there because he didn’t understand English. I still wonder what explanation his mind came up with. This is why I sit in the aisle. And why I wait until take off to drink my tea.

Going through security in a Canadian airport I was flying carry on only (before the liquids restriction, now I can’t even fathom how to do that) so I had my makeup case in my luggage. Apparently my eyelash curler looks suspicious so it was flagged by the x ray guy and my bag was opened. When they found said eyelash curler, the older male security guard repeatedly asked me what it was for, my explanations were not satisfactory so I had to demonstrate my eyelash curler in front of the back-up of fliers. Lesson learned: odd metal objects go in checked.

Other quick lessons:

When they announce your name overhead and say your plane is leaving, abandon your Tim Horton’s bagel and run

Always carry cash

Never rely on the in-flight entertainment system to work

Bring spare yarn

Roll with the punches

Thanks for reading,

The Knitting Doctor